me, the happy, relaxed, energetic, loving and adventurous wife of the future

i'm reading the book "marraige shock." and to my surprise, i am smarter than i thought. it is because of the premises outlined in this book that i am still single: because of the known and repeated subjugation of women by marriage, the requirement that they lose themselves in taking care of others who don't return the favor or which they are not supposed to accept if it is returned. this selflessness i will have no part of. yet society demands it as part of the "good wife" syndrome.

the author asks what marriage would be like if it were a wife's marriage. here is my first stab ever at this idea:

1. we would have a standing contract with several great chefs for discount orders and takeout would be delivered whenever we have guests, holidays and generally when nobody feels like cooking.

2. the husband would make one hot meal a day for the family and do the dishes afterwards. he would continue doing this until he realizes why #1 is in effect, at which point the family happily lives on gourmet takeout, freeing them all from the drudgery of the kitchen. (drudgery being defined in this case as cooking for people when you don't feel like it.)

3. children would be brought up learning how to make food for themselves and would be required to meet their own needs when they can do so.

4. the time now that the wife has since she has been freed from the kitchen will neither be spent in cleaning. as dust is a recurring factor and doing the same thing over and over again will eat her life away, she also contracts out for cleaning services. so now the family is both clean and well fed and the wife still has time to do...

5. what? what will she do now that she neither spends her life cleaning nor in the kitchen? she will do what her husband and children do: pursue self-actualization and take care of the misc. tasks that arise on a non-repetitive basis as the rest of her family does.

imagine the freedom from drudgery for a wife. the ability to arrive home from work, as i will do, and plop my feet up on the couch for 1/2 hour and watch tv to unwind. oh look at that. just like a man does. the ability to take care of my own needs first so i am happy and relaxed and able to meet the needs of my family. the ability to accept love as my husband and children do not act like infants (unless they are) and expect to be spoon fed.

6. oh i forgot the washing. since i hate sending clothes out, the washing can be rotated amongst family members. or each man for himself. there is no need to waste a wife's education, expertise, energy for love and happiness on a pile of cotton and soap suds. living breathing human beings are far better recipients of this energy.

ah now to find a man whose fantasy includes a living, breathing, happy, relaxed, energetic woman -- not one who is half-dead from doing things for her family that after they are 5, they can do for themselves.

did i mention how much energy i'll have for sex now that we all have my priorities straight? hmmmm. i don't think so...