hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
this is the dating person's meditative tone.
which i am humming in my head as i contemplate potential date with another yahoo personals guy. writes very little in his profile & tends to speak in platitudes: in his last message to me he ends with "Always work hard and play harder just remember always practice moderation." (to which i write back, damn, moderation is boring. like you're going to practice moderation on your trip to the Caribbean. NOT! :)"
then in his profile he says: "Life is short everyone needs to be happy." i think what he means is that his profile information is short. like 5 lines.
i'm going to call him platitudes guy. this should turn out very interesting, if it does at all.
of course i asked the obligatory are you married or in a r-ship or with someone who thinks they are in a r-ship with you? he asks if i want to see his divorce papers & then says he's going to the Caribbean, he'll call when he returns.
hmmmmmmmmmm. business or pleasure? with whom?
(not like i care but notice which part of the questions I asked he did NOT answer.)
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i also have a "date?" with a guy from my dance class sunday for burgers. the one who annoyed me a year ago telling me i wasn't breathing. (to which i desperately wanted to respond, well you don't have any hair, but it doesn't seem to affect your dancing either!) anyhow, i told him lately that statement really annoyed me, so it's not like he doesn't know.
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i might have another "friend" come over 2nite, waiting to hear back. a real friend, sometimes "friend."
so things are interesting in seeing-single-land.
February 01, 2008
January 30, 2008
bloody pissed
i love the word bloody. it's supposed to be a swear word, but it just makes me think of surgeries. or wars. i love it because i'm swearing but i don't feel like it. and if i get this cute little (or intelligent big) accent in my head, i sound very proper with my is-it-a-swear? word.
ok, back to topic. today i'm BPd.
boys are now everywhere in my life. well, they don't particularly live here in my town (small problem) but they're just wanting to talk to me & see me.
because i don't care.
watch me care. i'll post, "today i care." and they'll all feel it with their non-feminine intuition (which is always spot-on) and run and hide.
dammit. this always happens.
the minute you either get into a r-ship or don't give a s***, boyz attack you from all sides, eager to break down your love walls. (ha. like love handles but bigger.)
then you collapse, eager to let down your guard and not be at war with menkind (or not-kind) anymore, and they run and hide. afraid of getting hit by that wall on its way down.
my new mantra is to ignore each of them for a day after they contact me. 24 hours. let them stew. seems to keep them hopping around my little city (of lovelessness. well, not really, i do love me...)
so far it's working like a CHARM.
and that's why i'm BPd.
i love the word bloody. it's supposed to be a swear word, but it just makes me think of surgeries. or wars. i love it because i'm swearing but i don't feel like it. and if i get this cute little (or intelligent big) accent in my head, i sound very proper with my is-it-a-swear? word.
ok, back to topic. today i'm BPd.
boys are now everywhere in my life. well, they don't particularly live here in my town (small problem) but they're just wanting to talk to me & see me.
because i don't care.
watch me care. i'll post, "today i care." and they'll all feel it with their non-feminine intuition (which is always spot-on) and run and hide.
dammit. this always happens.
the minute you either get into a r-ship or don't give a s***, boyz attack you from all sides, eager to break down your love walls. (ha. like love handles but bigger.)
then you collapse, eager to let down your guard and not be at war with menkind (or not-kind) anymore, and they run and hide. afraid of getting hit by that wall on its way down.
my new mantra is to ignore each of them for a day after they contact me. 24 hours. let them stew. seems to keep them hopping around my little city (of lovelessness. well, not really, i do love me...)
so far it's working like a CHARM.
and that's why i'm BPd.
January 28, 2008
underneath it all...
it's hard to be pretty in new england. the seasons defy you. and the commute. in the winter the rain attacks your hair, that is if you're not already wearing a hat. so you can't have a do that a hat can't go over. you can't wear cotton if you're like me & temperature sensitive. then there's the leggings that have to go under your sexy jeans. and the endless pairs of kneehigh socks (black).
you have your commuting & non-commuting shoes. a whole drawerful at work that you change into, and then can't wear on weekends. you keep makeup at work so you don't sweat it all off - even in the winter - in your 15-minute walk to and from the train. up-hill both ways.
you have your dancing dilemmas. do you freeze getting to the dancefloor, and look sexy on it, or be warm getting there & strip down to nothing to dance?
then there's the suits. your pant legs have to be long enough to cover your heels, but not too long to drag on the ground when you run to catch the bus in your flats. and your flats have to fit into your handbag - which, by the way, do you want as a backpack or not?
the endless discussion of form vs. function.
as example, i've still yet to find another perfect pair of black shoes that i can wear all over town and during a work presentation as well.
dressing becomes an art form in the northeast. how do you do all of the above & still either look or feel sexy?
i've stopped caring to some extent. i used to always want to wear cute hats & have everything match & fix my hair just so so that when i walked down the street i felt cute.
not anymore. not having picked up any guys that way (though i did attract a car full of lesbians once) i now save my cute stuff for under there. or underwear.
today i'm wearing my winter uniform: 100% NOT cotton turtleneck with cordoroy pants (can't wear wool, b/c yucky snow lying around will ruin it) with some great high-top tennis shoes that i bought at walmart like 15 years ago (kid you not) for $15. they're like hiking boots. they're my 4th pair of snow shoes, in addition to my regular rain shoes, wellington boots & then big warm clumpers.
that's over top (not speaking of boots now) of my victoria's secret not-especially-sexy t-shirt bra & some black hot chilis that are indoor/outdoor appropriate.
but under all that...i have on...
...bright purple toenail polish that nearly glows in the dark...and some bright orange VS thong underwear with a big flower in the front.
oh, and they're cotton. but dammit, i'm sexy. :)
that's new england for ya. and for me!
just goes to show ya -- (which you haven't seen & won't) -- that you can't judge a girl by her cover!
it's hard to be pretty in new england. the seasons defy you. and the commute. in the winter the rain attacks your hair, that is if you're not already wearing a hat. so you can't have a do that a hat can't go over. you can't wear cotton if you're like me & temperature sensitive. then there's the leggings that have to go under your sexy jeans. and the endless pairs of kneehigh socks (black).
you have your commuting & non-commuting shoes. a whole drawerful at work that you change into, and then can't wear on weekends. you keep makeup at work so you don't sweat it all off - even in the winter - in your 15-minute walk to and from the train. up-hill both ways.
you have your dancing dilemmas. do you freeze getting to the dancefloor, and look sexy on it, or be warm getting there & strip down to nothing to dance?
then there's the suits. your pant legs have to be long enough to cover your heels, but not too long to drag on the ground when you run to catch the bus in your flats. and your flats have to fit into your handbag - which, by the way, do you want as a backpack or not?
the endless discussion of form vs. function.
as example, i've still yet to find another perfect pair of black shoes that i can wear all over town and during a work presentation as well.
dressing becomes an art form in the northeast. how do you do all of the above & still either look or feel sexy?
i've stopped caring to some extent. i used to always want to wear cute hats & have everything match & fix my hair just so so that when i walked down the street i felt cute.
not anymore. not having picked up any guys that way (though i did attract a car full of lesbians once) i now save my cute stuff for under there. or underwear.
today i'm wearing my winter uniform: 100% NOT cotton turtleneck with cordoroy pants (can't wear wool, b/c yucky snow lying around will ruin it) with some great high-top tennis shoes that i bought at walmart like 15 years ago (kid you not) for $15. they're like hiking boots. they're my 4th pair of snow shoes, in addition to my regular rain shoes, wellington boots & then big warm clumpers.
that's over top (not speaking of boots now) of my victoria's secret not-especially-sexy t-shirt bra & some black hot chilis that are indoor/outdoor appropriate.
but under all that...i have on...
...bright purple toenail polish that nearly glows in the dark...and some bright orange VS thong underwear with a big flower in the front.
oh, and they're cotton. but dammit, i'm sexy. :)
that's new england for ya. and for me!
just goes to show ya -- (which you haven't seen & won't) -- that you can't judge a girl by her cover!
January 27, 2008
in the trenches
so yes, my profile is still up. getting few e-mails lately. oh well. i'll just expire soon & keep dating all the exes that are popping up.
one guy was a bright one. on yahoo. he wrote to me several times, seemed anxious to connect. so on a whim i invited him to my friend's concert the next night. no response. three days later he writes, sorry i haven't been online. i write back, that's odd. yahoo shows that you were online in the last 24 hours. ha. i want another liar like a hole in my head.
i went away for the weekend & on another whim called a guy i've known for years but we had a falling out (b/c he was a workaholic & then when i got upset said some really mean things). so we reconnected over dinner & he now seems to want to reconnect even more. asking me if i could move there, am i seeing someone else, why did i call. i told him i had feelings for someone who wasn't available right now. i just can't trust a guy who says mean things like that though. we weren't even dating. can't even imagine what he'd say if we were married.
last night i met another old friend for dinner & he's coming to visit.
so life is interesting in my single land.
so yes, my profile is still up. getting few e-mails lately. oh well. i'll just expire soon & keep dating all the exes that are popping up.
one guy was a bright one. on yahoo. he wrote to me several times, seemed anxious to connect. so on a whim i invited him to my friend's concert the next night. no response. three days later he writes, sorry i haven't been online. i write back, that's odd. yahoo shows that you were online in the last 24 hours. ha. i want another liar like a hole in my head.
i went away for the weekend & on another whim called a guy i've known for years but we had a falling out (b/c he was a workaholic & then when i got upset said some really mean things). so we reconnected over dinner & he now seems to want to reconnect even more. asking me if i could move there, am i seeing someone else, why did i call. i told him i had feelings for someone who wasn't available right now. i just can't trust a guy who says mean things like that though. we weren't even dating. can't even imagine what he'd say if we were married.
last night i met another old friend for dinner & he's coming to visit.
so life is interesting in my single land.
women's plight
so i breezed past this old movie this morning, and heard only 2 sentences. there are 3 women sitting on a couch crying & a man talking to them.
he says, don't worry, everything will be ok.
one woman says into her handkerchief, sobbing, no it won't be ok. WE CAN'T GET MARRIED!
isn't that the plight of many american women? or else, the ones that others think we should have??!
sadly, women are perceived as nothing if they haven't chosen marriage. no matter if they've turned it down, unless a man bestows value upon them who are they?
so i breezed past this old movie this morning, and heard only 2 sentences. there are 3 women sitting on a couch crying & a man talking to them.
he says, don't worry, everything will be ok.
one woman says into her handkerchief, sobbing, no it won't be ok. WE CAN'T GET MARRIED!
isn't that the plight of many american women? or else, the ones that others think we should have??!
sadly, women are perceived as nothing if they haven't chosen marriage. no matter if they've turned it down, unless a man bestows value upon them who are they?
singletons unite!
this blog is in praise of the internet, blogging, and the online companionship some of us have found. i'm here drinking my coffee (alone) on a sunday morning (none of which i dislike!), & watching an old murder she wrote episode where the woman wonders how she'll make it alone if she leaves her husband but then finds a guy (the ex-thief character) who gives her hope and "opens up a whole new world" to her.
that's the world i live in. funny how women lose track of themselves. actually, sad. they (because i haven't done this) give up their earning potential to raise children and then are often left abandoned with a $20K earning potential to feed several kids. without kids, it is devestating enough.
i may be alone, but i'm not afraid for my future. no matter what happens, i can get a temp job quickly & hold it until i find a good-paying one. i could be crippled & still do that b/c of my chosen back-up profession.
anyhow, that aside, i next thought i wonder how twodatediva is doing this morning? so i quickly glanced at her blog (which i will comment on as the issue hits very close to home!) and then i thought, how cool is it that i can sit in my apt. drinking coffee & NOT feeling alone? b/c other singletons out there are sharing their angst at being along, their joy at their freedom and their comraderie in finding blogmates?
this blog is in praise of the internet, blogging, and the online companionship some of us have found. i'm here drinking my coffee (alone) on a sunday morning (none of which i dislike!), & watching an old murder she wrote episode where the woman wonders how she'll make it alone if she leaves her husband but then finds a guy (the ex-thief character) who gives her hope and "opens up a whole new world" to her.
that's the world i live in. funny how women lose track of themselves. actually, sad. they (because i haven't done this) give up their earning potential to raise children and then are often left abandoned with a $20K earning potential to feed several kids. without kids, it is devestating enough.
i may be alone, but i'm not afraid for my future. no matter what happens, i can get a temp job quickly & hold it until i find a good-paying one. i could be crippled & still do that b/c of my chosen back-up profession.
anyhow, that aside, i next thought i wonder how twodatediva is doing this morning? so i quickly glanced at her blog (which i will comment on as the issue hits very close to home!) and then i thought, how cool is it that i can sit in my apt. drinking coffee & NOT feeling alone? b/c other singletons out there are sharing their angst at being along, their joy at their freedom and their comraderie in finding blogmates?