and then there were 10...formerly known as, 10 little roses

you non-agatha-christie fans won't get the title, but that's ok. we love you anyway. ;)

matching up non-romantic spend-thrifts (wait, does that mean cheapskate or big-spender?) with little, pretty, fragile, disposable things that die is a recipe for disaster. this is probably why men use flowers only for a purpose. to get something.

i bought myself some gorgeous roses a few days ago from the street vendor & put them in my vase at work. at $12/dozen, and flawless, they were my between-v-day-and-b-day treat.

first, i gave a flower to my best friend at work. then there were 11.

the first guy that stopped by said where did you get those? i was in a really bitchy mood (and he's a good friend) so i said, do you mean do i have a guy around that is giving me flowers? no. i don't. (i knew he didn't mean where can i buy some...) i then proceeded to ask him why guys always have to ask where the flowers come from, as if a girl can't just buy them for herself because she likes them.

(just between you and me, i've bought myself roses for years, on v-day too. i see no reason men should have a monopoly on them when i can enjoy them just as much on-demand!)

fast-forward.

on the train, another guy was sitting next to me & drunk. cute, but very drunk. as in i could smell it. his eyes were really red too, so i couldn't tell if he was on something, drunk, or crying. anyhow, he was determined that i got the flowers from a guy for a reason, and nothing could deter him from that impression. he complimented me as though i made them. what do you say? yes, they are beautiful flowers. thank you just seemed to be taking too much credit...

is it your birthday he asked? no. i got them between valentines day & my birthday i reply. is it your anniversery he asked? no. finally he slurred out, so somebody just fancies you? after two tries i got it. and gave up. yes, i said.

periodically he looked over at me throughout the ride home, and i got the distinct impression that my value in his eyes had gone up because some other guy fancied me. (oh, maybe THIS is the purpose of flowers! territorial marking...)

when i went to get off i woke him up & said, would you like a flower? pick one. to my surprise, he conceded, yes, i'll take one for the road. he didn't thank me, but put the flower in his teeth, which i took as a rather sexy but not wussy way to hold a flower if you're a guy, & thought was adorable. it looks good on you, i said.

i wonder if he can carry that rose around & still be a man. i had a vision of him tossing it into the trainway. but then - he might have kept it too, & felt loved like i did.

yes, boyz, i love myself.

and then there were 10.