more crushes

have you ever had a crush on someone since childhood? wondered what would have happened "if"? and then - told them about it years later?

well, i did and i have.

i had a crush on this guy since 7th grade. he asked me to go out with him. i didn't like him then. and then as soon as i said no - i went crazy crushed on him. which lasted for what, until now?

i finally caught up with him on facebook. he's married now & has a few pre-teenage kids. lovely wife. firefighter in CA. and i told him about my crush.

he was sweet but unresponsive to the crush idea, which was actually better to me. since in the light of day crushes tend to wilt. it seems like it's fantasy that drives them, not reality.

so now all of a sudden - i'm free! it's like this angst "i should have gone out with t in 7th grade, my life would have been so different" is all over!

he's a real person. we're grown up. he's not the little cute boy anymore. and we are adults who went on with our lives.

ah, what a relief it is!