the little things
you forget, after being single so long, that some things might be landmines & need to be changed. little things like the wallpaper on your phone, pictures of uh, people & stuff like that. the things that are related to people that really aren't in your life or at least in any serious way, but sure look that way to someone who doesn't know any better.
my exercise 2nite i guess is to clean up my cell phone. i'm not someone who wants to have a code on my phone (though i know guys who do) or have it turned to silent all the time. in fact, those things scream "there are things about me you don't want to know." my doc & i had a conversation last night about transparency & even though we haven't had a state-of-the-relationship conversation, safe is better than endless discussion over nothing.
he has been transparent with me & i find it harder. but i will do it. because it's important to him. i don't think i have anything to hide, but sometimes just the fact that you're not out there with stuff makes it look like it.
it's going to be interesting try to transparentalize my life. i'm not really gonna jump up & do it all at once, but in the interest of fair play (& dealing with someone who is actually brilliant at deduction of the slightest nuance) it just makes sense.
so here i go to find my phone...
2 comments:
If you delete all the pictures on your phone that you don't want him to see... is that really being transparent, after it's been edited?
i would say so, given that they're basically meaningless in the context of whatever relationship we have...
pictures of guys i've been with in the past few years are nothing he wants to know about. neither does he want to know about the guys, any more than i want to know details about the girls.
it's not the pictures that is the issue i think, it's the respect or lack thereof for keeping them around in a place where they can be an issue. i have pictures everywhere of the guys i've dated. just not on my phone anymore. because if there are no pictures of him there, i would imagine there shouldn't be any other pictures of any other guy...
what he has on his phone i have no idea. i just don't want to say, oh use my phone & then have him see a wallpaper of my friend's naked top-half...or other such things.
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