not debited

i keep checking my bank balance to see if the jerk deposited the check i sent him back. nothing yet. i wish he would.

i texted him today (a no no but WTF, it' MY life) saying it was all a facade, eh? him "liking" me. you don't stop caring for someone in 4 hours and disappear. that i had trusted him [he had made a BIG deal about me trusting him. now i know why, lol] as a man of honor? where had that man gone?

honor is apparently easy-come-easy-go with some men. they think everyone in their life deserves honor except their women. shocking.

what did i do to him to make him dishonor me? threaten to reject him sometime maybe in the future? he gave me no guarantees & no affection at that point. nah, i did nothing to deserve the dishonor.

his disrespect of women is in his head. it's just so hard to deflect that. i need teflon.

isn't that toxic though? [imagines being sprayed with it, how sexy it would look if it were bronze. but then what, die from the chemicals? better that than grief? hmmmm.]

dammit, jerk, cash that check already. just give some indication you have exited the building. why do I have to be the one to realize you left?

where is the early warning system before a guy ejects? i mean, did i miss all the lights & sirens?