slotting
boy refuses to be put in the right slot. this is very annoying.
i tried the a*hole spot, but he doesn't quite fit there since there was some sort of explanation for his behavior. (i always like to start with that of course.) i tried the player spot, yes, that's a fit, but not totally, since he's still around! i tried the friend spot, nope. too sexy for that. boyfriend, not. ex-boyfriend, not, but closest so far. never-talk-to-again, already happened, that's out. f*buddy, no. the only place left for him is FWB. & why would i want that, cuz i don't want to hear about his other conquests.
i guess he might pick a slot for himself at some point. if he contacts me again. most likely, i'll call him the next time i go thru town & we'll see what spot he's picked.
the interesting thing is, that it's difficult to tell a player that doesn't care from one who does. i don't particularly mind players. especially if they're from out of town. no sense in tying yourself down to someone who's not around. i have a number of boyz i've dated that are players & as long as they treat me well, let them play. players that don't care = a*holes. players that do, that's where the slotting trouble starts.
some girls can just walk away from their boyz. i really wish i could. problem is, i'm so damn picky that i like only like 1 guy/year. and ones that i like, i really like. so why kick them back out of my life if they're good people? if they have some future use (place to stay, show me around town, date), might as well keep them around.
i was reading plentyoffish.com lately. awesome site. best site out there for comments from folks. also reading a book called bootcamp for the brokenhearted. it makes a statement that men take their cues from women. it probably explains why mr. ny responded to me in kind. everything i did, he copied back to me. i thought it was just the sign of a player (which it can be) but it also appears to be common to men that are trying to please you and don't know you well.
well, in a few days i'll have mr. ny put somewhere in my head & be ready to move on. he's taking a while though. he's a very complex guy. it's rare to find a guy that has different sides to him & if i can take my pick of them, i might just do that...
in the meantime, who's next?
3 comments:
Players... hmmm... you are right. If they are from out of town it's fine because you don't have to see them with someone else. Especially difficult if you live in the same town, hang out in the same places, AND really like him. Then it is torture.
Those relationship books always make everything the woman's responsibility. Is it really all up to us? The books say to be nice, sweet, kind, gentle, forgiving... cater to his ego, don't ever be negative, blah blah blah. But what happens when the guy starts being kind of a jerk? You don't understand why so you try to follow the book and he doesn't respond the way the book said he would. Now what? What are you doing wrong? Maybe nothing. Maybe the guy really isn't such a great guy... maybe HE is not acting the way he should. Some guys are just not that good. Some look good on the outside, act nice and fabulous at first, but after a time the hollowness they hide inside begins to show. It's hard for me to figure that part out because I take responsibility for everything.
It would be great if you did a posting on emotionally immature men. How do we spot them? At times they are hard to identify. They have jobs, drive themselves around, manage money, own guns, but something is just missing in them and no matter what you do it won't work out.
Dude...I tried to get to that site and got a porn site instead! Are you trying to trick me?? LOL
ooooooooops. typo. ;)
try this...
http://www.plentyoffish.com
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