men r gr8 - #2

ok, another sample of good stuff from the conference that really hit home with me. (see this conference wasn't about rah rah men, it was about making sense of them. so all the stuff was very logically explained. nice.)

so we bang on men for being so logical & not emotional. but really, they are emotional. they just have this filter first.

women: feel --> act
men: feel --> think --> act

they also make decisions based on facts. not feelings.

i can't tell you how many sucky relationships this fact has saved me from. i just reviewed them lately in my mind & it goes something like this. it never went like this verbally - just in what happened. now i get it!

me (feelings): i'm emotionally attached to you. so i'd like a relationship with you. because even though some things don't work, i don't want to leave!
him (thinking): we're not getting along very well. why would we get further into a relationship?

this fact was driven home by my ex who came to visit wanting me to marry him. this is after we're already getting into arguments after only being together 2 days. and how would this marraige work out exactly?

now that i understand that men do feel, but they don't act on those feelings - but on facts & logic - it makes perfect sense.